Summer Recaps: Dallas Symphony 'Mozart's Requiem'

Back in April as a birthday gift to myself, my sister and I visited the Dallas Symphony at the Meyerson Symphony Center. We were there to see Mozart's Requiem live, one of my favorite classical music pieces. If you've seen the movie 'Amadeus' you would understand. Although the movie wasn't entirely accurate, it told the beautiful yet tragic story of Wolfgang Mozart's life.

 This mass was written by Mozart right before this death and was left incomplete. It was said to be written to Count Franz von Walsegg to commemorate the anniversary of this wife's death.

As the orchestra played, the lyrics were displayed on the background right above them. Something about reading along as the choir sang made it even more special to watch. I found myself in tears just thinking about God's grace and mercy on us. I truly left like I was praying.

Grant them eternal rest, Lord,
and let perpetual light shine on them.
You are praised, God, in Zion,
and homage will be paid to You in Jerusalem.
Hear my prayer,
to You all flesh will come.
Grant them eternal rest, Lord,
and let perpetual light shine on them.

-- Introduction Lyrics 

Selfie before the concert.

This was the first visit to the symphony since elementary. I look forward to attending other concerts. Check out the video below from Dallas Symphony's website about this special concert. 

Birthdays and New Beginnings

So far April is off to a great start!

Two weeks ago, I started a new job at a new company. I prayed countless of times for an opportunity like this and I'm excited to explore this new chapter. Most of April will consist of lots of training. At the end of the month, I'll be traveling to New York for a full week of more training. Can't wait!

Also celebrated my mother's birthday two weeks ago. Kicked it with her for most of the day. I took her out to dinner and surprised her with some family guests. My mother and I haven't always seen eye to eye, but I thank God for her life. Our relationship continues to improve and I have faith it will only get better. 

About a week ago I celebrated a special occasion. I got baptized. A video of my testimony played right before I was dipped in the water. As I stood in the tub waiting for my turn, I wanted to cry. Life has not always been sunshine and rainbows. Five years ago, I was a lost and angry child begging for an end to the pain. Since my encounter with my Christ, I've become alive again. My purpose in life is beyond anything I will ever imagine. I rejoice and have faith that it's no longer I who lives, but He who lives in me.

I have been crucified with Christ & I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. -Galatians 2:20

Monday,April 13th was my birthday. It was also the first day of training. I spend the majority of my day in a room full with strangers. I was a bit intimidated at first, considering I was the only female, but still held it down. Later on that evening, our new bosses took us out to dinner. We had a great time and somebody ordered me a desert with a candle and the group sang Happy Birthday.

This birthday signified a celebration of another year to be thankful for new life and new hope. I remain faithful that God has special plans for me and I can't wait to see what is to come!

Today I read one of the realest articles on Buzzfeed titled, 'This Is What Depression Looks Like.' As I read the stories of others reveal their struggle with depression despite the happy pictures, I was reminded of a time I felt the same way.

I opened up about a year ago in a post titled, 'Hardest Thing You've Ever Experienced' (BTW I need finish to answering all 28 questions asap). I want to share a couple of pictures of times one would assume I was happy. But deep down I felt very unwanted, empty and alone.

This was my 21st birthday. Nobody knew at the time that the reason I was acting shy about my birthday was because I dead broke. My boyfriend at the time offered to buy my meal for my birthday.

I took part in various organizations, including playing a huge role in starting one. Despite sharing many laughs, deep inside I felt so alone. I was struggling in my classes and had no desire to get out of bed most days. Of course, I always made the best to share how fine I seemed to be.

I was one of the lucky students selected to visit my high school with the president of the university, President Powers. The purpose of our visit was to motivate students to go to college. I wondered how the heck I got selected, because clearly they didn't check my GPA. I had no business encouraging other kids to attend college, when I myself didn't even want to be there. 

First Marathon COMPLETE!

Last December I ran my first marathon. I also had the opportunity to share this experience with my best friend, Jarrah, who ran her first half marathon that day. I couldn't put into words the mix of emotions I endured during those 26.2 miles, until now. 

Months of training finally came down to this day. Since it was my first marathon I didn't know what to expect. I had no game strategy other than to keep running and hoping to cross the finish line alive. So I played it safe and ran at a slower, comfortable pace. Something I semi-regret because although I did run pain free for most of the race, my finish time wasn't that great. 

I usually run with music but the cheers from the awesome spectators were too loud to pass on. Around mile 6 I read a poster that said, "Embrace your pace." Simple yet comforting words for an anxious first-time marathoner. It was exactly what I needed to believe. 

Reaching the half way point was a small victory. The downhill that came right after was so refreshing and very much needed. The next 4 miles were ran along the White Rock Lake. It would of been a nice view had the weather cooperated that day. I had to dig deep to push against the cold wind from the lake. It was around that time that it started to pour rain. At this point I just wanted to wave the white flag.

Before the race started, Jarrah and I chatted with another runner about how excited we were for the race. He said that in a marathon, a runner is really running two races. A 20 miles race and a 6.2 mile race. He said the last 6 miles were pure mental hell and he couldn't be farther from the truth. Up until mile 20, I hasn't felt as mentally drained. By this time I've been running for more than 4 hours. I was finally reaching my breaking point. Soon I lost my pace group and slowed down even more.

Around mile 25 I began to cry. This came from a mixed of, "God, I'm almost done!" and "Wait! Nobody's waiting for me at the finish line!?" I really thought my family was waiting for me at the finish line but due to the weather and other circumstances, they couldn't make it. I had to snap out of it quick. One can't just run and cry at the same time, without struggling to breathe. I had to suck it up and push hard because I could hear the loud cheers from the crowds. The finish line was coming up. 

The most frustrating part of those last 2 minutes was that I could hear the crowd but couldn't see the finish line. Talk about a major tease. But finally I was done. 

I crossed the finish line like a rock star. I seriously held that pose for some good 30 seconds LOL. The thought of finally being able to walked seemed so relaxing but it was quite the opposite, at least for me. Walking after running a marathon was the worst pain I experience during that race. I could barely take a couple of steps after reaching the finish line. I was dying to find a bench, a sidewalk, anything I would sit down and rest. I finally did but then I walked around some more before I caught the train back home. I chatted with another runner on the train the whole way home. I didn't get his name but it was nice to finally talk to somebody after talking to myself for the last 6 hours.

I'm not gonna lie, marathons are just not for me. I think I'll stick to half-marathons and maybe run the full Dallas Marathon in December to close out the year. I do look forward to improving on my time and just enjoying this running journey the Lord has blessed me with.